Have a cup of tea.
Thomas Jefferson’s tree of liberty may have been watered with the blood of tyrants and patriots, but when it comes to bloodshed and global drama in human history, nothing holds a candle to tea. (Except maybe candles themselves. Those were a pretty big deal for a while there, too.)
From the moment some mad genius decided to combine hot water and leaves, humans have been killing each other about it. Trade roads and shipping routes and national borders all bear the marks of trying to get the really good tea from one place to another.
If King James had SideDeal, maybe he wouldn’t have been so bent out of shape about his stuff going in the harbor.
Well he didn’t, but you do.
Not only can we set you up with your next few dozen cups of tea, but we’ll give you five awesome varieties to try from. 1000 years ago, this could have required the conquering and subjugation of five different regions and at least one strategic marriage alliance, but our supplier has managed to sort it out using mostly Microsoft Office and decent WiFi.
Plus it’s organic, just like in the (very) old days.
And those varieties aren’t just yummy flavors, they are basically functionally distinct super powers reduced down into teabags. Breathing and digesting and winding up and winding down—there’s a tea for that, and we’ll send it to you.
Order yours and have your own personal stockpile of anytime goodness, ready in five minutes and WAY cheaper than a cup of drive-through coffee.
So sit back and enjoy. Kingdoms were toppled for this stuff, so it’s really the least you could do.
(And stay tuned for similar SideDeals in the future, where we’ll try to come up with rare spices and silks that dazzle the eyes.)
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